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Surveys
2011
November
Q
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Carmen's Return to Chicago-- How does it make you feel?
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Has the return of Carmen to Chicago caused you any of the following:
Panic attacks
Heartburn
A desire to relocate
Loss of consciousness
Incontinence
Other
Have you sought therapy to help you deal with Carmen's return? If so, what advice did the therapist offer?
Which of the following best describes Carmen's backhand?
Horrific
If Martina only knew
I have to avert my eyes
Slovenly
Gross
Other
Reports indicate that October's freak storm was Boston's last effort to rid itself of Carmen's evil influence. True or False?
True
Other
Comment:
How would you rate the University of Miami, (from where Carmen allegedly graduated) on the following dimensions?
Well Below Average
Below Average
Average
Above Average
Well Above Average
It generally prepares students for a trade
The Hurrifelons football program does good crime
It (barely) maintains it's accredidation
It is sunny and warm
Comment:
Knowing that Carmen is returning to Chicago, how likely is it that you will stock up on liquor and red wine?
Very likely
Somewhat likely
Other
If Carmen lists you as a reference, would you recommend her?
No, never recommended
Have recommended once or twice with regret
Have recommended several times when on drugs
Other
Carmen suffers from a number of intellectual deficiencies. In her time in Boston, has her intellect improved?
Same
Somewhat lower
Much lower
Other
Do you have any suggestions to improve Carmen's limited intellectual capacity?
What is your gender?
Male
Male Transgendered Gay
Male Transgendered Straight
Female
Female Transgendered Lesbian
Female Transgendered Straight
Male or Female-- Just not interested
Carmen
Prefer not to answer
Other
Which of the following categories describes your age?
Younger than 48
Older than Carmen
Prefer not to answer
Other
What best describes your employment status?
Employed full-time but hate my boss
Self-employed still hate my boss
Unemployed, looking for work-- Carmen
Unemployed, not looking for work-- Carmen
Drunk-- Carmen
Asleep--Carmen
Homemaker (but still can't make coffee)-- Carmen
Prefer not to answer
Other
Which category best describes your annual income?
More than Carmen
Less than Carmen-- so sorry
Prefer not to answer-- but still more than Carmen
Other
All responses will be strictly confidential and Carmen will never know...........
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